In his letter to Titus, the apostle Paul explains to his fellow minister that the grace of God trains us to “say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions” (2:12 NIV). Jesus uses similar language when He teaches His disciples to answer requests directly: “Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’” (Matthew 5:37). For the Christian, in other words, there is a right time to say no—and a crucial element of leadership is knowing when that time is.
To do God’s work in God’s way, we must be willing to rule out not only what is wrong but sometimes even what is good. Certain choices are forbidden to Christians outright; others may be permissible but unwise. In either case, our aim is the same: to honor God above all else.
Nehemiah, who led the rebuilding of Jerusalem’s walls and called God’s people to renewed faithfulness, shows us what such discernment looks like. In Nehemiah 5–6, his example teaches us four things to say no to.
No to Undue Privilege
In Nehemiah 5:14–15, we see the book’s namesake first saying no to undue privilege. “I was appointed to be their governor in the land of Judah,” he says—and yet,
from the twentieth year to the thirty-second year of Artaxerxes the king, twelve years, neither I nor my brothers ate the food allowance of the governor. The former governors who were before me laid heavy burdens on the people and took from them for their daily ration forty shekels of silver. Even their servants lorded it over the people. But I did not do so, because of the fear of God.
Nehemiah had been given a prestigious and powerful position, and it came with benefits. But he also recognized the cost of those benefits to those he served. Rather than follow his predecessors’ example, then, he gave up a privilege that would have placed a further burden on the people.
Nehemiah explains that he was moved to say no by “the fear of God.” Seeing the effect that his “right” would have on God’s people, he chose to surrender something that would benefit himself in order to honor God. He was marked by a genuine, heartfelt, life-impacting concern for God’s glory—and, of course, compassion for God’s people.
The lesson is straightforward: Just because we can claim a privilege doesn’t mean we should. Nor does the fact that others have done something justify our doing it. Before asking what we are entitled to receive, we ought to ask how we can love God and our neighbors best (Matt. 22:37–39).
No to Pride
Nehemiah also had every opportunity to boast. In 6:15, we see that Nehemiah completed the wall he’d set out to build, and he did so with remarkable speed: “The wall was finished on the twenty-fifth day of the month Elul, in fifty-two days.” That’s enough to give anyone a big head!
Yet Nehemiah’s account is strikingly free of self-exaltation. Rather than claiming the credit, he records that even the surrounding nations “perceived that this work had been accomplished with the help of our God” (v. 16).
While Nehemiah worked diligently and led decisively, he lived in the awareness that God was sovereignly involved in his life, providentially dealing with him. He understood that the success of his efforts depended on God first and foremost. His example reminds us that even our greatest accomplishments are occasions for gratitude, not self-congratulation.
No to Mindlessness
Trust in God, however, does not require us to believe everything we hear. Nehemiah certainly knew that people’s motives are not always what they appear to be. Jesus calls His followers to be “wise as serpents” (Matt. 10:16), and Nehemiah demonstrates why such discernment matters. A healthy sense of skepticism about ourselves and other sinners will protect us and under our care.
In 6:2, we read that Sanballat and Geshem, opponents of Nehemiah who saw no benefit for themselves in Jerusalem’s wall, sent Nehemiah an invitation: “Come and let us meet together at Hakkephirim in the plain of Ono” (Neh. 6:2). The invitation might have sounded reasonable, but Nehemiah recognized the danger: “They intended to do me harm.” His opponents hoped to frighten the builders into abandoning their work (v. 9).
Nehemiah did not allow his unwavering dependence on God to lull him into dreamy cluelessness; instead, he trusted the Lord while remaining alert to those who sought to deceive him. Belief in God’s sovereignty does not absolve us from the duty of personal vigilance. We, too, must exercise discernment rather than mistake gullibility for faith.
No to Distraction
Nehemiah answered these opponents straightforwardly: “I am doing a great work and I cannot come down. Why should the work stop while I leave it and come down to you?” (v. 3).
Nehemiah understood the importance of the work God had given him. The question he poses is honest, and it’s vital. Nearly every man or woman whose life has left a positive mark—in history, in family, in friendship, in business—has a common characteristic: they knew what they were doing, why they were doing it, and when they were doing it, and they weren’t going to let anybody divert them from it. Nehemiah’s response challenges us to consider whether our commitments reflect our priorities or whether lesser demands are steadily drawing us away from what matters most.
Jesus Himself displayed this clarity of purpose. After He healed many in Capernaum, the disciples found Him praying in the countryside and said, “Everyone is looking for you.” Yet Jesus replied, “Let us go on to the next towns, that I may preach there also, for that is why I came out” (Mark 1:37–38). He did not allow the crowd’s expectations to displace His mission. In a far greater way than Nehemiah, Jesus knew the work He had come to do—and He remained faithful to it.
Saying No for the Sake of Yes
Of course, Nehemiah’s refusals were not ends in themselves. He said no to privilege in order to serve God’s people, no to pride in order to give God the glory, no to naivety in order to guard the work, and no to distraction in order to fulfill his calling. Each no protected a more important yes.
There is a time for no and a time for yes. When we seek first God’s kingdom and righteousness (Matt. 6:33), we gain a clearer sense of what we must refuse. God’s grace teaches us to say no to ungodliness so that we may live “self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age,” as we await the return of “our great God and Savior Jesus Christ” (Titus 2:12–13). A well-placed no, then, is not a mere rejection; it is one way we say yes to Christ.
This article was adapted from the sermon “The Power of Negative Thinking” by Alistair Begg.
